Little Green Friend

Buck was walking from one office building to the next on his way to lunch when he noticed a splash of green flash suddenly across the sidewalk. It was a Rough Greensnake, a real, honest-to-God opheodrys aestivus!

Instantly Buck sprang into action. He crouched low and reached for the snake’s tail, but the serpent was too quick! It sped into the grass in search of cover, but fortunately for Buck the grass had been mown recently and he could see the snake clearly. He walked along after it, trying to corner it, but it was elusive, moving this way and that with startling quickness, and Buck missed it twice more before having to break into a run just to keep up. Finally he managed to snag it at the base of a tree.

The snake feinted toward Buck’s wrist and face as if to bite, but Buck had done his homework and held on firmly but gently. The Green Tree Snake (one of its other names) is very docile and does not bite. Buck knew this through both research and experience. He had caught one just like this one once when he was a teenager, and remembered that it had been quite friendly. This one was no different. After a few frightened moments the snake calmed right down, wrapped itself around Buck’s arm, and took a good gander at Buck’s ugly mug, forked tongue tasting the air between them. It was relaxed and curious and soon didn’t mind being handled at all. If anything, it seemed to be enjoying itself. Buck used the opportunity to get a good, close look, checked out its vernal side for coloration, observed the pattern of scales, and determined that Mr. Snake probably hadn’t eaten in awhile. It was a rare treat because the species’ natural camouflage makes it very difficult to spot, but it was especially rare to find one out and about so late in the year. “Aestivus” means “summer” in Latin, and the name was applied to these snakes because they tend to be inactive year round except for the hottest summer months. Buck had been looking for one for the last three months and had resigned himself to giving up for the year.

“What is that, a snake?” asked a guy standing on the sidewalk along with another dude and a hot brunette babe. “Is it trying to bite you?”

“No,” said Buck, suddenly self-conscious. “They don’t bite.”

“How do you know?”

“It’s a Green Tree Snake, Virginia’s only true arboreal snake,” Buck replied, hearing how geeky he sounded even as he spoke the words.

“We were wondering what you were doing,” said the girl. Buck could only imagine how hilarious he’d looked running erratically through the grass and the mulch. Then the three people turned and walked away.

Buck was left alone with his captive. For a moment he actually considered trying to find a way to bring the snake home and keep it, but then reason and his genuine care for these creatures overcame his irrational impulse. The second quickest way to kill the snake would have been to take it home and try to figure out the ins and outs of snake ownership after acquiring it rather than before. Besides, true reptile lovers interested in husbandry always look for individuals born and bred in captivity to avoid depopulating the species in the wild.

The first quickest way to kill it, of course, would have been to step on it, which is exactly what many people would do if they came across the snake on the sidewalk. People can be funny about snakes, and Buck understood that. Buck had a thing against crickets. So rather than put his little green friend back where he’d found it, he walked closer to a cluster of trees and released the snake onto a branch.

Within ten seconds it had completely vanished.